How to Rescue a Damaged Relationship

HOW TO RESCUE A DAMAGED RELATIONSHIP

Steps to Reconciling a Broken Relationship

Building a happy, healthy partnership takes work and may not always be easy, especially when there has been a breach of trust. Even the strongest relationships face challenges.

Broken relationships are a part of the broken world that we live in. It is the emotionally disturbed or the physically wounded that hurts another.  Therefore, do you go about that? Here are some tips to get you started, whether you are dealing with the fallout from a betrayal or trying to keep a long-distance relationship going.

 1. Pray and Speak from your heart. Surround yourself with wisdom and godly advice. All we have sinned. Engage in self reflection Mt 7:3-5.

2. Confess your wrongdoing. Take full responsibility if you are at fault. Ask sorry or apologise.

3. Extend compassion and care to the person you hurt. Give your partner the opportunity to win your trust back.

4.  Confront the person who offended you. Attitude is everything. When you approach the issue with humility, your adversary is disarmed. Practice radical transparency

5. Learn to compromise. Negotiation and compromise are two keys to conflict resolution. All relationships require give and take.

6.  Use skilled communication. Plan a weekly ‘couples meeting’. Actively listen

7. Break the pattern. Spend time with friends outside of your relationship. Get their opinion.

8 Say ‘thank you’ for the small things

9. Maintain intimacy

10.  Seek professional help

PSYCHOLOGICAL HEALING IN RECONCILIATION John 13:35

If you Love one another, by this the world will come to know that you are my disciples.

Forgiveness and Health

PSYCHOLOGICALLY one feels a sense of security after the act of reconciliation.  Reconciliation brings about healing in spiritual, psychological, social, interpersonal and intrapersonal realms. Human beings are endowed with the capacity to attain wholeness and perfection and are meant to grow to fullness. However, growth involves risk taking.

Forgiveness plays a vital role in human relationships to strengthen all aspects of life. It is dealt with multi complex connected with spiritual, social psychological, cognitive, emotional and physical factors [witvliet]. Forgiveness is a motivational change and it is a process triggered primarily by increased empathy toward the offender.

Genuine forgiveness requires compassion, benevolence, and love for the offender, together with relinquishment of the right to revenge, resentment, and indifference. It is evident that forgiveness is important as a possible repair mechanism for the conflict that occurs in relationships (Enright & North, 1998).

Religious as “experts in communion”

An important aspect of missionary service to the world is the witness of fraternal life in community.  In his letter to all the consecrated persons in the year of consecrated life Pope Francis invited all religious to be “experts in communion” and “make the Church the home and the school of communion” (II.3).

Three golden words in Amoris Laetitia:

Pope Francis (Amoris Laetitia): To have a happy married life, husband and wife should use three words daily: I am sorry, Thank you and excuse me.

Five Love languages:

According to Gary Chapman (1992): There are four things that lead a couple to divorce. They are blaming, criticizing, contempt and stonewalling. Gary tells that presence, support, affirmation, Gift and touch can facilitate couples and lead them to happy married life.

Conflict styles:

What is your style? Competing, Collaborative, Accommodative, Avoiding and Compromising. People react to crises or conflict in different ways. 1. Crying alone 2. Become aggressive, 3. Dialogue and find solution

Acceptance Commitment Therapy

According to Stephen haleys in Acceptance commitment therapy, Forgives will come when there is no anger. To get rid of anger one has to accept the other as they are. Tolerance will increase. Life will be wonderful

Attachment therapy

According to John Bowlby, an insecure stage is unhealthy.

According to parenting styles, authoritative style is healthy and others such as authoritarian, neglect and permissive are unhealthy. Authoritative styles break and wounds relationships. Bossy mother curtails the creativity of the child.

Intimacy VS Isolation

According to Erikson in, intimacy is a big issue in marriage when there is no trust.

Love and Belong

According to Abhram Maslow, the need to belong (Love & friendship) is the third hierarchy of human needs

Anger VS Hatred

Anger is good but hatred is unhealthy. It has to be released through Gestalt therapy. Our Mission is One of Anger-Reduction

Cluster A Personality Disorder

Paranoid, Schizoid and schizotypal

CONCLUSION:

Biblical reconciliation is the process of two previously alienated parties coming to peace with each other. Because God has reconciled us to himself through Jesus Christ, we can reconcile with each other, no longer counting our offenses against one another.

 Restoration is God’s major work beyond creation!  Since we are all part of the body of Christ, shouldn’t we always get along with each other perfectly? How often do we approach the sacrament of reconciliation? Seek your brother in private. Pay evil with good. We need to know how to be an active part of God’s restoration work in making broken things whole. Starting with our relationships with our brothers and sisters.

 Therefore, Let His Spirit do work in your lives and save a marriage or religious life! How good and pleasant is it when brother is live in Unity (Psalms 133:1)